My father in-law found out today that he has lung cancer My husband is taking this very hard what can help?
Question by chi chi: My father in-law found out today that he has lung cancer My husband is taking this very hard what can help?
I will find out monday how much time he has. I have read that most people die within 2 months. This is very hard to deal with and I would like so advice on what other people have done in like cases.
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Answer by git r done
i found out 1 month ago i have it also,i have not told anybody.so my wife or family doesn’t know.don’t know how to tell them.my wife knows something is wrong but she doesn’t know what.so i will let someone else answer this for you.i feel for your husband because i remember loosing my dad.you never get over it.and i have 3 sons.tell him to hang in there and make good use of the time he has.
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My dad made it over a year, and his was non-treatable. Your husband is doing some anticipatory grieving. Cut him some slack if he gets short tempered, don’t continually ask if he’s okay….. tell him once if he ever wants to talk, you are there for him.
Volunteer to do stuff for dad, as he will have decreased energy and shouldn’t waste it on house cleaning, grocery shopping, etc. Spend quality time with him. See if he wants to make a video or something for the grand kids. All in all, spend time with him.
There are many types of lung cancer, and each is different.
Let me know if there is anything I can do to help…..
Sue
there is little time left, I’m sorry. my 23 year old daughter pass away on Jan. 13 2007, she never smoke! she was in perfect health . we found out on Aug 17, 2006 she had lung cancer. she pass away 149 days later. we were not prepared, Jessica has three younger sisters 21, 19, 16. and before you knew she was gone. the only thing i can say, let your father in-law, make he own choice.love from the abate family.abate6@bellsouth.net peter .regina.angel jessica. christa. elenarose. gina
Tell your husband to be there for his father and don’t make him feel any worse than what he is feeling by becoming depressed. He should be the one to make him happy when he is depressed. Go to his doctor visits with him, this can give him strength. Just pray, pray, and pray some more. Being sad around him makes him think the worse. It is a hard thing to do when everyone is thinking death around him. Tell him not to treat him any different, just be there for him remember the Father needs his son more than he needs him right now. Just keep your husband busy and not moping around the house all day. Do things that can make him happy after being there for his father.
i am so sorry about the news you have got about your father in law, i totally understand when your husband is going through….
My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in February this year, it is hard to be strong and be positive for them when you just want to crumple to the floor and cry….
my dad lost his ‘unfaif’ fight to the evil disease on 4th May, i still feel much anger towards this very rapid cancer…..no one is ever fully prepared no matter how long you have known ……
but we still had hope that he still could have at least 12 months….
my advice to your hubby is to spend as much time with his dad as possible, taking him out, chatting about anything and everything…… anything to take both their minds away from the cancer if only for 10 minutes………..all share lots of love n hugs and give each other support.
good wishes to you all xx
I feel your pain. My father was diagnosed with metastatic Stage IV lung cancer on 1/17.07 and passwed away on 6/3/07. It was a tough battle but he was brave to the end.
The best advice that I can give is listen to the doctors but also try anything possible outside of the normal cancer treatment. Chemotherapy did not work on my father and by the time I found out about alternative treatments, it was too late. This is a very difficult time in everyones life involved. The second piece of advice that I can give you is to support your father in law and advocate for his care. My dad was 78 and I had more meetings with his doctors than he did. Since his cancer was metastatic, there were 3 doctors involved and keeping them all coordinated and on the same page is critical. You will find that you and your family are alone in taking the “lead” in his medical care as far as advocacy is concerned. I am here to help and will answer any questions that I can. God Bless You
My husband had it and died very, very fast. We told the children and surrounded ourselves with our family. We cried a lot and held each other. Get hospice going soon. You will have so much more support and he can be made comfortable. We got it very late. I was angry that he had to suffer at all.